Chasing shadows. And a new resolve.
It’s finally back. That yummy and delicious afternoon sunshine that’s warm enough to play in and late in the day enough to…well…play in. The time of day where you run through the long shadows cast by houses into those patches of sunshine and stand there long enough to make sure you don’t really need that jacket.
Oh afternoon sunshine, how I’ve missed you. The days of picking the Goldfish up from school, running home, then jetting from the car to the warm house are over for a while.
I will not miss the cold that we’ve had this winter. I will not miss being stuck inside for too many days.
I need the silly shapes of shadows and the way that even the concrete looks sparkly at this time of day.
I need to stand outside and listen to birds and laughter echoing up from the park down the street. And I need to watch my children try new tricks because now their legs are longer and their balance is better and their hearts have even more in the way of courage.
They need to roll and tumble and pull the dead and leftover grass from winter’s grasp and let the new grass breathe, uncovering plants lying dormant and waiting for the ground to be warm enough to give them their time to grow up, up, up.
There’s dirt to be dug up and sifted through; discoveries to be made with the help of tools and magnifying glasses and containers to hold their treasures in.
There’s enough time in the afternoon now to rest, to take a break from the craziness of trying and trying and trying.
To wait for your get-up-and-go to come back and get after it.
Yeah baby. Even the cat thinks that this is worth hanging out a while longer.
I’m loving me some shadows. They’re even present for a self portrait.
As I said. Yeah baby.
And with this new drawing out of the days, I am reminded that it is, yet again, another page turned in the calendar, which also reminds me to reevaluate some priorities and realign with my heart and health, which means wealth.
This month? A carryover from last month on one thing: cleaning out the ol’ desk. Short month + two huge birthdays + a massive makeover of the boys’ rooms = I didn’t leave ample time for that. So this month will be the one for it.
Second, there’s a Paleo Challenge going on at my gym that I have pledged to do for two months, which means eating clean and working out hard, as well as being creative with cooking and sharing recipes. So with that, I hope to get back to posting more frequently under that category on this site (as well as finding out what happened to the recipes we had already posted there? I’ll get my web guy on that).
And third? An embarrassing thing that I do that I wish to change. I use the word, “retard,” and it’s hurtful. I don’t mean it to be, and I try to use it appropriately, but more times than not I use it in a derogatory way. I just read this post and understand deeply that I need to choose differently. I am surely intelligent enough and have a breadth of available words in my vocabulary to use my language more compassionately and purposefully. So it’s time to change a bad habit.
Have an awesome afternoon chasing your shadow.
I love how you describe the wonders of returning to the outdoors once winter begins to fade. My favorite time of year. The boys’ pics so fully describe it all! I love to watch them grow up here! Many thanks. And on the note of the use of “retard.” Your posting struck a chord. I used “the word” from time to time until I had a grandaughter with developmental retardation. That and “short bus” stab me now. Too bad I had to be with it up close and personal before my eyes could be opened.
thank you toni. so many of my friends’ lives have been profoundly shifted by a child with disabilities; some were able to prepare for their births and some were caught unaware. but i know that’s just a beginning, that “just the knowledge that it’s present” part. i really appreciate your comment. and i appreciate, more than i can express, you watching your grandchildren here. :) they love and miss you, we all do, and it helps bridge some miles between us. they both love seeing their own pictures here and holden, in particular, LOVES when people comment (as do i!). thanks for being a great Gram!