Just what I needed, but not what I deserved.

Heard that very thing this weekend, and I’ve been sitting on it ever since. I wrote it down, I’ve looked at it, doodled around it, spilled a little bit of coffee on it, rescued it from the Terror’s mad coloring showdown, and just downright pondered it.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how I can do that for my children. Listening through their tears or frustration into what they really need. It’s hard to listen when you’re too busy just hearing stuff.

Hearing is a physical ability while listening is a skill. Listening skills allow one to make sense of and understand what another person is saying. In other words, listening skills allow you to understand what someone is “talking about”.

I just read an article about hearing; about a person who has a hearing impairment can “listen” very well, sometimes better than those of us without an impairment.

And then I read this. I realized how there are a lot of times that I’m not listening to the good stuff. The loud stuff forces you to stop and tend to a situation or an issue, but the good stuff? Better slow down so you don’t miss it.

Reminded me of yesterday morning. We’ve been spending lots of nights lately with the Terror nestled up between us for a near full night of sleep. He’s going through something. Developmentally, he’s surging. Numbers, colors, new words, learning to jump; he’s leaping and bounding through some growing and while it fills his day with extreme excitement, it fills his nights with an overload in processing and he just needs to be held closely and tucked up under my arm with his feet shoved into Daddy’s back.

So there he was, just coming out of a state of groggy, and those little chubster hands reached up to rub my face, then my arm, then my chest. I could have stayed there forever. And since I was just coming out of my own state of groggy, we whispered and sang songs softly, and every once in a while I got peppered with slobbery kisses and a messy hug or two.

Boy. It was what I needed.

But not what I deserved.

I had been cranky. And impatient. And loud while saying things about that mess or this thing we needed to go do.

Thank goodness for the grace in getting what you need.

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